How do you really move on from something that changed you for good?

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How do you really move on from something that changed you for good? How do you completely get your mind off what happened in the past? How do you overcome the sadness that comes along with getting flashbacks from sad and happy memories about it? How do you keep calm when you go back to the same places?How do you really do that?

I’ve been praying for over a year now for someone to give me the answer but nothing, for something to give me a hint, for even myself to explain how is it possible that the person itself never really meant much to me, but instead the situation has been tormenting me for so long.

To this day I still get these thoughts: “Why didn’t it work?” “What did I do wrong?” “Why am I the only one who still remembers and feels kind of hurt?” “Why?” . It seems unfair, doesn’t it? My answer to all of these questions is that I’ll just have to live with it and move on from the past. But I haven’t completely listened to myself yet.

Don’t get me wrong. I haven’t just been sitting for this whole year thinking about it and doing nothing. I have actually accomplished a few things this year, the most important being feeling happy and self-loved. But you know how bad thoughts or memories appear so suddenly and ruin your moment, your day, your week, your month or maybe even your live.

Anyway, what I’m hopelessly looking for is leaving the past behind and really moving forward. Nobody can enjoy life to the fullest when he continues to blame himself for things that aren’t important and aren’t even really his fault. But again, how do I achieve that? How do I move on from something that was over before it began but still meant a lot to me?

Amalia Boura